My world is complicated these days. Nobody prepares for the news that the person you trusted more than anyone in the whole world is guilty of a horrendous crime. His family of course loves him and is scared for him, my family is scared of him and does not like him at all... I don't trust him, part of me misses the person I thought he was and part of me is scared of what the future holds. The only thing that is certain is that he will be in jail for at least 5 years.
My body is all new. I am 15 pounds heavier than I was pre-pregnancy, I have stretch marks and one boob is bigger than the other. With all of this said I am trying to embrace the new me. Losing the weight will happen at it's own pace. All I can do is exercise (I have a personal trainer and I play soccer) and eat right (I try... I could do better though!). As for the stretch marks they may fade but they are here to stay and I will learn to live with them. I look decent in clothing and someday I will love myself naked again.
Nugget is wonderful. She is honestly the best! Does she fuss? Yes, but hey she is still the cutest fussy budget I know. She is lucky enough to get a lot of love from my family my ILs and her "aunt" Ice who watches her during the day. She is smiling now and laughing a little :) I just love her so much!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Court today
X is going to court today to sign his plea deal. He will plead guilty to receipt of child pornography. His deal is for somewhere between 5-8yrs in federal prison. Though in federal court the judge can choose to give a longer sentence if he wants.
I will not be attending court because the local news may be there. I can't handle that and honestly there is no reason for me to be there. He will not be sentenced today, that will happen within the next 3 months.
It is still hard to beleive that this is my life right now and that it will always be a part of Nugget and my life. We will move on and move past the hurt but it will always be there.
I will not be attending court because the local news may be there. I can't handle that and honestly there is no reason for me to be there. He will not be sentenced today, that will happen within the next 3 months.
It is still hard to beleive that this is my life right now and that it will always be a part of Nugget and my life. We will move on and move past the hurt but it will always be there.
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