Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Happy Birthday!

My sweet little girl turns 1 today.
I gave birth to you during the most difficult time of my life. I labored naturally and ended up having surgery to bring you into this world safely. I cried when I saw you for the first time as most mothers do... but my tears came from fear. I was so scared I was going to fail you. That I alone could not possibly be enough for this precious baby. You deserved a "normal" family, a mom and a dad. I had so many plans for you... So many of those plans had to be changed. There has never been a time in my life where I have felt so unworthy and so scared.

Here we are a year later. Nugget you are the amazing thing in this world. My fear melted away over a short time. When I look into your eyes I become a warrior. I will fight for you until the day I die. I will guide you and protect you. Being your mother may have saved me and I promise to spend every day making this life the best one I can for you.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

you are absolutely amazing! I've spent the last few days reading your whole blog, and I'm blown away by your strength and resiliance. But, as a mom, I guess I know where that strength comes from. :)

I wish I could give you a big hug, and/or a big box of diapers. :)